|A house in Parmawala, Bijnor district|
She was the strongest person I met last week. The others seemed utterly beaten down by all the challenges they faced. And who can blame them? An unimaginable lack of options and resources, all their efforts laid waste by god-like dam authorities, and the burden of generations of malnutrition and illiteracy.
I came home tired yesterday and crept into Mian's arms. There I usually find comfort, but not last night. I lay for a long time listening to his breathing, with the reassuring weight of his arm across me, and I was terrified.
Mian and I, we are truly blessed. Our home, our family, our friends, our work, each other. I come back from visits like these and am scared that this is too much to have. Is there something like being too happy? too rich? And I know this is silly of me, but last night all the old tales of the jealousy of gods kept coming into my head.
I am scared.