Today I was nursing an upset tummy with some cumin tea and thinking that I would have quite liked to be a witch- well clear of the inquisition/Manusmriti times, of course. But then I thought a little more, and realised that hey, I am!
Consider the facts:
· Lives alone in a house that is um, unconventional: check.
· Feels uprooted when in an unfamiliar ecosystem: check.
· Has a small but growing list of loyal clients for whom she performs the following services- health and wellness advice, home remedies, love potions, strategy and counselling sessions, fortune telling: check.
· Is paid in kind for said services: check.
· Most clients consult her in the wee hours of the night: check.
· Has a familiar who is independent, but chooses to hang out with her: a slug. Check.
· Attempts to cure or at least soothe most health and beauty troubles with things from her kitchen: check.
· Has next to no processed foods in her pantry: check
· Said pantry is a source of morbid curiosity to most people: check.
· People fall over each other not to be the first to sample her cooking, but are quite eager to be the second person: check.
· She has recipes that include dried animal parts/ things collected from roadsides/ instructions to enter a forest at a specific time: All of these. Check
· Has a strange, non-trend related, but interesting wardrobe: check
· One can hear voices in her house in the middle of the night, but here’s the scary part- if you peek in, there’s no one there!: You bet skype counts as magic. Check.
· Has evidence to prove that all ills can be solved by a mug of tea: check
· Is not referring to Assam Black when she says ‘tea’: check
· Is irresistibly sexy: well, if you insist. Check.
· Has heard of modesty, but will have no truck with the concept: Read this post. done.